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"What Happens In Vegas" Review

What_happens_in_vegas_2 So I did it. I was in dire need of the most mindless movie possible and figured that though Speed Racer has been billed equally as tragic as What Happens In Vegas, I realized that both my brain and retinas would appreciate something that didn't make me feel like I was rolling on E. It's as if there was something in my head egging me on. Telling me that I just had to see this movie even if it happens to be the most contrived piece of crap ever invented; it a) Cannot be worse than Ishtar and b) The ol' train-wreck phenomenon. Even though I should not look I just had to look and stare in awe at Cameron Diaz's blatant (and repetitive) stupidity because really, I dare you not to do it. And I know, I'm a terrible hypocrite who just last week accused Made of Honor of 'smacking me in the face with obvious' then 'calling me dumbass'.  I also thought that I was going to get dumber just by saying the words 'Made of Honor' out loud. Like if someone heard me they would question my literacy. But y'all, sometimes you just need a chick flick. Something predictable to the point where you're tripping over yourself because ha! You already know what's going to happen. On that note mea culpa.

There's an air of familiarity when watching Cameron Diaz be redundant and to be honest no one gets on my nerves the way she does. It's like she's perpetually the same character in every film and I'll say one thing; she's damn fine at being a cliche*. Kudos to her on that count. She plays Joy McNally, a painfully serious, Wall Street type who gets dumped by her fiance due to her incessant need for perfection. Ashton Kutcher - again PAINFUL, but he's got the whole cute, shaggy, kinda funny, dark haired type - is Jack Fuller. A 30 something year old, recently fired from his job in furniture making (by his father no less) for being unable to grow up. Dude has some serious Peter Pan syndrome going on and even his pseudo girlfriend thinks that he is unable to ever commit to a serious relationship. Jack gets fired, Joy gets dumped and their respective friends suggest a trip to Vegas. And my God, what will happen next? They end up drunk and subsequently married.

They decide on an annulment and not 27 seconds later, Jack uses Joy's quarter on the slot machine she had just been playing (imagine that!) and he wins 3 million dollars (GASP!) Both lay claim to the money so their judge (played by Dennis Miller) forces them into six months 'hard marriage' that comes with bonus couples therapy with a psychotherapist played by Queen Latifah. What ensues is rather typical of any movie that involves marriage after extreme drunkeness and two polar opposites forced to live side by side and make their 'marriage' work. Slightly funny but not so mindnumblingly stupid that you feel your brain power diminishing after each line.

I'm not going to suggest running out to see this movie if looking for a good date night film or even a good 'chick flick'. But like I said, it's about as mindless one can get without feeling completely duped by a studio. The laughs are there but wholly insufficient but I'm assuming that it beats out watching McDreamy be mediocre and boring for 90 minutes. So once again, thank God for Netflix

*Obvious exceptions to this: Any Given Sunday and Being John Malkovich. Also I can be hyperbolic. We all have our faults. 







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Comments

Shelly

Ya, I got sucked into this one too..not terrible but not super funny. The best part was at the very end after the credit started to roll with the two friends - but other than that - wait for rental!

Isabel

I hate to say it...but the commercials for this one make me want to see it. And I don't really like Cameron or Aston. I think I just liked the idea of a married couple on the big screen that don't like each other.

(Although I'm pretty sure they end up in love before the movies over.)

Thanks for taking one for the team, Heather!

NoPasaNada

You know what, I really don't mind 'taking one for the team' when I know that the rest of the summer is very promising. This is just a bit of a movie lull but y'all, so much awesome stuff is due out later. I'm super excited.

kdiddy

"so much awesome stuff is due out later. I'm super excited."

ME TOO

patrick

most of the chick flicks i've seen with Ashton Kutcher have been at least halfway decent, A Lot Like Love is one example




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