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Dina Lohan Has an Ice Cream Meltdown

Dina-lohan Only in the Lohan family can a trip to the ice cream store result in a dispute that requires four police cars and several "official statements" to resolve. 

Keep raising the bar, Lohan family.

 In her continuing quest to prove that her priorities are completely screwed, Dina Lohan marched into her local Carvel and produced one of 75 Carvel Black Cards issued to celebrities in honor of the company's 75th anniversary last year. What do you get? Free ice cream for 75 years. 75 years. You can get free ice cream until after you die with these cards. Anyway, Lindsay Lohan, and quite possibly Ali Lohan, got cards. There is some heated debate about this. 

**Cries. Bemoans fate of society.**

Apparently Dina and her family have pushed the limits of Carvel's free ice cream kindness. The company says they've abused their privileges and they've given them as much as they can without Lindsay and Ali showing up to claim the goods for themselves. Carvel said, per Radar:

"At first, we graciously honored their requests while explaining that the Black Card was not a carte blanche for unlimited Carvel Ice Cream for the extended Lohan family and friends.  After more than six months of numerous and large orders for ice cream, we finally had to cut off the card and take it back."

Carvel boy apparently said, and I paraphrase, "Nope. Celebrity must be present to get free ice cream for 75 years. We have had enough of your crap, Dina Lohan." And Dina was all, no way, give me my cake. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. 

Dina-lohan-lindsay-lohan-ali-lohan Four police cars showed up, and a helicopter (seriously?) summoned by Dina, who should maybe show as much interest in other things involving her children as she does in keeping the house stocked with that horrible blue gel icing that is the only thing I ever associate with Carvel. 

Know what Dina said? 

"It just shows how we get treated so much worse than regular people." 

Right. Because you know what I do after I put my pants on one leg at a time and I want some ice cream? I go to the store and I get it. I get out my wallet (or the dollar bills crammed in the side of my purse. What?) and I assemble my paltry funds and I pay for it. Carvel doesn't give me anything. They only take. Take and take and take. 

Actually they don't, because I don't go there, but if I did that would be how it would play out, for sure. 

And as much as part of me wants to snark on her about this all day long, the other, bigger part says "What the hell, Carvel?" I have never heard a celebrity talk about Carvel in my life. But maybe, just maybe, if they shoveled out some of their special fancy black cards to kids who can't afford ice cream, or to college kids -- mini-ice cream scholarships, if you will -- they wouldn't have these kinds of problems. 



. . . . .

Laurie is more of a Cold Stone fan herself.

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Gah, can we just get rid of all of them? The level of entitlement that the collective exhibits is nauseating and makes me want to heave blunt objects at their heads.


Honestly, I am not that big on reading about celebrity antics and so on. There are so many crazy people in the world.

But I must admit, this is a pretty good story because it does make you curious. What could this person possibly do--what kind of interchange could take place--at Carvel--that would result in the police being called?

And how much Carvel ice cream could they have been eating? Aren't they thin people? Were they living on Carvel ice cream?

This one is a pretty good story. It's like 'how did that coyote get inside the grill of the car' kind of story?


Sounds like they were lending the card to their friends and letting their friends use it to get free ice cream.

And by "friends", of course, I mean "pathetic hangers-on who suck up to these horrible, horrible people to get free ice cream and other perks."


Let me begin by stating I loathe the Lohans. But I read a very different version of this story a couple of days ago. Dina said that she, Lindsay, Ali and their younger brother all have the Carvel card. She grabbed Ali's by accident and the clerk wanted to see ID and since she isn't Ali, he grabbed the card from her & he was the one to call the police thinking that some thief had gotten ahold of the precious black Carvel card. I am sure there are lies embedded in there, but this was the version I read on a news site.


I sincerely doubt that Carvel gave all those Lohans cards. If they only made 75, they're not going to give a whole glut of them to one family. They want to spread them among as many different celebrities as possible, so they can have as many famous people as possible photographed coming out of their stores, not just a handful of famous families.

I do not doubt that Mama Lohan lied about having a card of her own, however.


When I was young, a scoop at Baskin Robbins cost about a dollar. This being so, I measured the price of EVERYTHING in scoops of ice cream. I don't think my brain could have handled the concept of unlimited ice cream for life, because what else is money FOR? You could barter for anything with ice cream. These people are rich TIMES INFINITY!

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