Brooke Hogan, I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means
I will admit that the meat of this Sun article is boring. Aggressively boring. I've fallen asleep three times already, in fact.
Breaking! Brooke Hogan rolls around on a beach in a bikini while shooting her new music video. (Or maybe it's me, just waking up from my Boredom Nap! Let me check the filename. Nope, it's Brooke Hogan.)
FASCINATING, I know. Substitute "Brooke Hogan" for "Heidi Montag" or "Paris Hilton" or "Boobie McBlondie Froealflalasnasn211" and it's like DAMMIT, mah gossips are in reruns already, and it's not even Sweeps.
And yet...
The reality TV star is pictured writhing around on a beach in her bikini filming the video for comeback single Falling.
Got that, people? Don't call it a comeback! Wait, no. Yes. Call it a comeback. Relaunch, maybe? Does that work? She's...back, from somewhere else, to this new place, and I don't think either place had anything to do with a position on the pop charts, but maybe she's just talking about her place in our collective awareness of her continued existence, which in that case, OH MY GOD, I'VE PLAYED RIGHT INTO HER HANDS.
If you're just DYING to listen to the relaunchificomebackorebirthitude of Brooke Hogan, here it is.
Related posts: In Other Words, I GIVE UP, No Brooke, Seriously, Shut Yer Piehole
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I can't BELIEVE that I am commenting on a Brooke Hogan article!
Okay, I made it 59 seconds into the song before I realized it sounded (a) awful and (b) like all the songs my sister listened to in 1992 on Power 92 FM, that is to say, utter shite!
Also, the rebirth of Voldemort is less horrific than the idea of Brooke Hogan having a career in music.
Posted by: Marmite Breath | April 22, 2009 at 09:57 AM
hilariously written.
Posted by: michele | April 22, 2009 at 10:06 AM
It does sound very 1990s. Wasn't Brooke trying to be a country singer?
Posted by: PomJob | April 22, 2009 at 11:28 AM
You had a Power 92, too! That's hysterical!
Posted by: Accidental Housewife | April 22, 2009 at 11:44 AM
Any article with a Princess Bride quote as the title gets my read, even if it's about douches. That quote gets frequent use as I work around many an idiot and douche.
Posted by: Allison | April 22, 2009 at 01:43 PM
You won't hear this often - but I think Brooke Hogan is too trashy for country.
Posted by: AmyC65 | April 22, 2009 at 03:56 PM