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Yet More Carrie Prejean Topless Photos Found. Cue Satan's Laughter.

Carrie_Prejean_Miss_USA Faithful Carrie Prejean. Not only does the putative Miss California believe in Jesus and "opposite marriage," she also believes in Opposite World, which is the tanned Californian version of Bizzaro World.

In Opposite World, Prejean only posed topless once when she was seventeen and naive, and those further photos of her posing all nippled up on the beach never appeared on TMZ.com (see photo slideshow here - NSFW).  In Opposite World, Prejean was tempted by Satan to endorse Same Marriage, until she detected God in her heart, or possibly her saline sacs, and stood up for what was right.  Also in Opposite World, vapid opportunists who strike deals with beauty pageants for free implants are tremendously important folks. They can lie and lie and lie and somehow not run afoul of The Lord.  You know, the opposite of Satan, against whom she took such a valiant stand.  Could it be that she mistook Perez Hilton for the Enemy?

For a brief while I was tossing an ember of sympathy from hand to hand for Prejean.  The Miss USA pageant is a prim and bizarre affair in which long-legged and big-toothed women compete to symbolize a nation's virtue in a bikini and high heels.  Asking politically sensitive questions of these women in such an artificial environment seems unfair and a bit cruel.  Prejean was in it to win, and she judged that it would not be a winning move to celebrate Same Marriage in a contest whose living spirit is Donald Trump's erection.  Mendacious? Probably.  Outrage-worthy? Barely.  Criticizing a Miss USA contestant for a conservative stance on marriage is a bit like taking a whale to task for living in the ocean.

Even when a pathetically tame 'topless' photo appeared, it seemed a bit much to push for her removal.  But as image after image tossed up on the blinking shores of the internet, some of them taken after the Miss USA pageant paid for the refurbishment of her tits, it became apparent that Prejean was not only lying, but that she clearly did not care whether her lies were found out.  And why should she?  After all, she's still Miss California.  She built a crystal boat out of her beauty and guilelessness and sailed it the hell away from the rest of us.  She has made her way to Opposite World and bought a house right on the beach, where the truth is provisional and the sunsets last all day long. Get Perez Hilton to fix you a cosmo when you visit.

UPDATE: I made a mistake in the original post, which commentor Baltimore Gal pointed out and I have since fixed.

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Actually, she's Miss California. The reason I hate her the most is that she claims the reason she LOST the Miss USA pageant is the Q&A. She says if she had gotten a different question she would have beaten the other contestant, Miss North Carolina I say hey, you're from California chica. Answering a current events question ABOUT YOUR STATE should be par for the course.
I actually hate pageants altogether but Miss USA, run by Trump, is so much worse than Miss America to me.


Whoops. I knew this going in to the post, but I got confused in the typing. All corrected now. Also, all instances of 'Miss America' are now 'Miss USA'.


Well it's not like the difference between lithium and strontium or anything that severe- I knew what you meant!

Still galls me that she thinks her belief system (rather than the way she answered the question or any other part of her performance) is the reason she lost.


"Well it's not like the difference between lithium and strontium or anything..."

Dear heavens, how I love me some Baltimore Gal.


Not that I'm admitting to watching this in any way, but the chick on Make Me a Supermodel on Bravo running around saying she's always naked around her son so he won't grow up to be gay made me throw up in my mouth a little.

The original outrage over her answer to the question was just silly. Clearly, these women aren't picked for their brains or their political savvy. Remember Miss South Carolina and her maps?


And this is how we choose to represent the women in our country? Yay.


Riiiight. Because sons of women in fashion NEVER turn out gay. Anderson Cooper could vouch for that. Wait...


Love you too!

Katie Kat

The main thing here is.... IT'S JUST RIDICULOUS that this is even news. She's a prejudiced, fake titted, holier-than-thou, twit with no knowledge of the real world. We should tie her and all her Barbie Doll-bobble-headed girlfriends up and use 'em for shark bait.

Not that I care... :)

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