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Weeds Recap

Weeds_lounging2 Nancy glares at Cesar while she prepares her Weird Pregnancy Breakfast of a hard-boiled egg, mustard, and ginger ale. Ew. Cesar glares back and finally says that he's through with her. Nancy's not lucky enough to be rid of him entirely. Sucio has come to take over as Nancy's bodyguard/goon. And Sucio is kind of grungy. He and Cesar speak briefly. Sucio, confused by the barking dog doorbell, asks where the dog is. "Eating breakfast," snarks Cesar.

Celia is happily enjoying her morning coffee at the rebel camp while Rudolfo struggles with the rough drafts of some ransom notes for his upcoming kidnapping of the minister of commerce. Celia critiques his writing and insists that he dictate the notes to her. One of Rudolfo's underlings comes in to ask who should go on that night's recon. Rudolfo orders him to assign it to two soldiers but Celia interrupts and says that those two had teasing issues in school and that dynamic is no good and orders the underling to send someone else. Surprisingly, Rudolfo doesn't look grateful for Celia's help.

Andy comes home to Nancy's house and is greeted with Sucio's gun pointed at his head. Nancy informs Sucio that Andy's her brother-in-law, so "no shooty." She introduces them and Andy says, "Sucio? Like Su-Su-Sucio? Phil Collins?" Eh, not quite, Andy. He reports to Nancy that Bitchface is pretty fine but Nancy doesn't want to hear anything good about her. Sucio tries to follow Nancy to the bathroom but she makes him wait outside. Andy keeps pressing him about the Su-Su-Sucio thing, but they're interrupted when Nancy bolts out of the bathroom and says that she needs to go to the doctor immediately. She's bleeding and miscarrying your drug lord's baby seems like a bad thing.

At Esteban's doctor's, Andy whines that it's creepy and he's thirsty and he's afraid to drink the water and the magazines are all old. Nancy pats his hand and says that she's sorry that this is so hard for him. Esteban barges in and asks Nancy if she's been behaving recklessly again. Nancy shrugs and says that maybe it's all that rough sex she's been having. Ahem, ESTEBAN. If you're concerned about the kid then you might not be so quick to throw the mother down onto a desk and rape her. Andy mutters his disapproval of the Mexican doctor, noting that "down there, you want a Jew." The ultrasound is fired up and thankfully all is well with the baby. The doctor asks Nancy if she's taken any cocaine or methamphetamines and Nancy reports that she's been off both for at least a week. Neither the doctor nor Esteban find the joke funny. The doctor orders her to rest and Esteban tells her to get home. She asks for a ride but Esteban growls that this crisis has already disrupted his schedule. "If I hear you're not relaxing, there will be consequences." Well, shit, when you say it in such soothing tones you practically lull me into Dreamland! Andy congratulates Esteban and says that he'll be a great dad.

On their way back into the house, Nancy points out the outdoor shower to Sucio and tells him he can use it whenever. But Sucio notices that the door is slightly ajar and tiptoes inside, gun at the ready. They are surprised to find Silas inside. After Nancy calls off Sucio, Silas starts puttering around the house being way too nice to Nancy. She smirks and asks him how much money he needs. Silas explains that he wants to open a medical marijuana club, promising that they won't get busted now that Obama's in office and suddenly, after watching this show for five seasons, I'm like, "Duh! They're in California! Why didn't they do this years ago?" Nancy thinks it's a bad idea to open a retail venture in this economy but Silas is like, "Uh, it's marijuana. It's recession proof." Eh, the kid might have a head for business after all. Finally, he points out that, like it or not, Nancy made this the family business. Nancy finally relents on the condition that he not let Doug anywhere near the product. Shane and Bitchface walk in and Sucio is at the ready. Nancy explains that this is her other son, but that Sucio can feel free to shoot Bitchface. Shane explains that Bitchface banged Andy and apparently he was using those pictures that he took to blackmail his way back home. Nancy insists that he go back and orders him to keep his mouth shut about what a nasty whore his aunt is. She and Bitchface talk for a bit, arguing about Shane's placement, when Andy walks in. He and Bitchface go upstairs to diddle each other some more while Nancy sits on the couch and splits a sandwich with Sucio.

Silas and Doug are at the...whatever office you go to when you start a business. The lady handling their application is a sweet, old grandmotherly type and this makes Silas a little uncomfortable. When they finally explain the purpose of their intended business, the lady excuses herself to talk to a superior. Doug, of course, calls her an uptight bitch and rummages through her desk to find some candy to steal. When she and her superior return, they inform Silas and Doug that they need to obtain permission from the local law enforcement.

At dinner, Bitchface tells everyone about how Nancy dated her math teacher in junior high. Apparently, this has long been a source of contention between the two sisters, which is psychotic, because as Bitchface expands on the story it's obvious that the math teacher was an insane pedophile. Nancy excuses herself to go vomit. After she and Sucio leave, Bitchface says, "I don't mean to be judgey, but where'd she meet that guy home depot?"

At the rebel camp, Celia awakes to find herself being muzzled and dragged out of bed.

Silas and Doug are with a cop, walking through the area where they put their shop. The cop is concerned about how their business will affect the wholesome nature of the area...so he's gonna need a cut of their action. Doug asks if they can have a second alone, since they're new to this whole extortion thing. Doug draws on his experience as a corrupt city councilman and they goof and offer the cop a monthly payment when a percentage of their earnings would have been better. However, the cop is pleased with their goof and signs the necessary papers on the spot.

Nancy is on the couch reading What to Expect When You're Expecting when Sucio smacks at some flies that are buzzing around him. Nancy has finally had enough and leads him to the outdoor shower. Sucio requests a loofah, so Nancy heads upstairs and has to pass by the room where Andy and Bitchface are getting it on...with enthusiasm. When she returns to the shower, Sucio is gone. And there's some blood and what looks like a wire. Nancy grabs Shane and goes upstairs to Andy's room. She waits a few seconds and finally tells them that they need to leave with her. "I waited until you came. Be grateful." That was pretty nice of her.

Celia wakes up and finds herself on a bus. In Texas. I guess Rudolfo didn't appreciate her help, which is too bad, since they actually seemed pretty good for each other. But perhaps Celia's ties to him will help Nancy out of her current situation? Perhaps Rudolfo could take out Esteban?

Nancy is hurrying everyone into the car so that they can head to the airport. Bitchface demands to know what's going on and warns Nancy that she better not start her story with Koreans, referring to the yarn that Andy spun at her house. Of course, Andy wasn't far off from the truth so I don't think there's any way Bitchface will be happy. Nancy more or less spills her guts about how badly she's screwed up her life and apologizes to Bitchface for leaving her to deal with stuff like their parents getting sick and dying. Esteban calls Nancy and she tells him that she's fleeing. Esteban is stunned to hear about Sucio's disappearance and tells her to get to a safe place. As they pull away, we spot Roy Till from the CIA in a care nearby, watching.







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Comments

Suzy Q

Another stellar recap, kdiddy! You always seem to point out a few details I miss, probably because your brain is younger and perkier than mine.




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