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True Blood Recap: Release Me

Trueblood5 Praise His Light, I'm back! It was a long week without regular internet access and no HBO, and the kids in Bon Temps were mighty busy infiltrating and orgying and whatnot. We found out that Daphne was that pig that belongs to Maryann and that Maryann was the horny demonic bovine thing and had an eye for cutting out Sam's heart. We also found out that the Newlins had some seriously psycho shit planned, which surprised...uh...no one. Well, except for Jason but that's not really hard to do. Lafayette and Terry bond over Lafayette's post-traumatic stress disorder in a scene that kind of made me tear up a bit, but all of the golden healing lights won't protect Lafayette from Pam and Eric, who push him back into the V-dealing business. Sookie and Hugo's infiltration doesn't exactly work out, but Bill can't come save them because Lorena showed up and demanded some quality time. And Jessica and Hoyt are cute as buttons.

Andy, having spotted Daphne and Sam in their animal forms, is running through the woods trying to find the pig that's been tormenting him. He comes upon the orgy that Maryann is throwing. She's decked out in her bull mask, vibrating and doing some interpretive dance, and getting ready to ritually slay Sam. Andy fires a shot, allowing Sam to run away, which makes everyone at the orgy freak the fuck out. Nobody likes a party pooper, Sam. Maryann runs after Sam and we see that she's grown some pretty serious claws (all the better to claw your back with, my dear) but Sam spots an owl, shifts, and flies away, which is handy. For some reason, this totally stumps Maryann and she returns to the orgy. Everyone there is still freaking out but eventually they calm down and are just kind of bummed out that the shapeshifter barbecue that they were promised apparently isn't happening. Andy spots Terry and tries to talk to him, but Terry spins around and breaks Andy's arm, which cracks Arlene up. Well, that's a fine how-do-ya-do.

Sookie and Hugo are locked in the Light of Day basement. Sookie tries calling out to Godric while Hugo starts having claustrophobic panic attacks. Sookie checks out the disturbing board games that the church is producing, stuff like Vampire Executioner. They discuss who the rat from the Dallas nest could be, since it's obvious that the Newlins knew that they were coming. Sookie wonders if Bill is on his way, having heard her screams for help, and if he'll be safe approaching the church since they're getting ready to grill Godric.

Bill is trying to convince Lorena to let him go and they flash back to Los Angeles in 1935. Lorena is wearing this amazing green dress and has brought home a young musical starlet for Bill to gnaw on. But Bill refuses, saying he doesn't want to do such things anymore. Lorena coos that he can't starve himself and he should just have a little taste. Bill's fangs are out and he lingers near the girl's neck before collecting himself and ordering her to leave. Lorena calls Bill a wet blanket and says that she doesn't know why she puts up with him. Bill gets all angsty over their murderous cavorting but Lorena protests that he's a vampire and it's just his nature. Bill accuses her of losing all of her humanity. He means this as an insult but Lorena's like, "Um...YEAH," and tells him that he's still young but will eventually outgrow that pesky conscience of his. Back in the present day, Bill tries again to leave and they throw some furniture at each other, resulting in Bill threatening Lorena with a broken table leg/stake. Lorena laughs at Bill's love for his pathetic little human. Lorena's kind of a dick, but Sookie's a pain in the ass and I can kinda see where she's coming from.

Eric and Isabel approach the Fellowship of the Sun church. Eric scoffs at their little army but Isabel warns him not to underestimate the power of a few dozen zealots. Yeah, ERIC. International terrorism ring a bell? That's like the same five dudes who keep fucking everyone's shit up. Anyway, Eric asks whay could possibly be taking Sookie and Hugo so long, but Isabel assures him that everything's fine. She did sense something from Hugo earlier, but it passed. Eric questions Isabel's interest in humans, especially since they don't keep so well, but Isabel says that it's kind of like a science project. She suspects that Eric is interested in Sookie but he denies it. He's only concerned about finding Godric. They ponder the fact that nothing human could overpower Godric, which means that some serious shit is going down in the church. Yikes.

Jason and Sarah are sighing in the choir loft after their illicit diddling. Sarah's crying but she explains that it's because she's so happy to realize that she loves Jason. You see, Jason's, um, "love" is much bigger than Steve's. Jason says, "That's...intense?" Yeah, totally, because Sarah feels closer to God than ever and before Jason can explain that those were just orgasms, which she might not have experienced with Steve, Sarah's getting dressed and wants to go tell Steve about their love right now. They have to, in fact, because of their vow of honesty. Jason points out that they're about to be locked in the church all night with Steve...and his guns...and his bullets. Sarah, all breathy, agrees that they'll wait to tell him until after the lock in because the Lord's work must come first.

Jessica and Hoyt have been making out all night and Hoyt finally confesses that he's never Done It with a girl. Jessica laughs because she's a virgin, too, though she totally would have been a slut if she could have gotten away with it. They can't get down to deflowering right away, though, because it's nearly dawn and Jessica explains that she gets sick if she doesn't rest. They can cuddle, though, but Jessica warns him not to freak out if she looks a little, you know, dead.

Isabel and Stan are walking with Eric to their rooms (I think? It's not clear where this is happening) and Stan is boasting about how he wants to just bust into the church and kill everyone, but Isabel notes that with no plan or exit strategy, that approach is doomed to fail. Eric grabs Stan and lets him know that he's not very fond of him and, in fact, suspects him of being the rat. Stan points out that he has no proof of this but Eric swears that when he does find proof, he will show Stan no mercy. COBRA KAI! Besides, if Godric is dead, nothing will bring back what he's lost. We see a little tear of blood seep from Eric's eye.

Tara and Eggs wake up at home and Tara asks how they could have gotten there since the last thing that she remembers was following Eggs into the woods. Eggs isn't concerned since they smoked and Maryann's weed is some serious shit. This doesn't make Tara feel any better and she says that maybe they should sober up. Eggs says they can, but points out that just because she got too high doesn't make Tara her mother. Tara softens and says that sometimes it's like Eggs is Sookie and he can read her mind. Eggs assures her that he just gets her, is all. Mmhmm.

Sam, still obviously shaken from his escape, busts into Merlotte's and goes to his office. He reaches his hand into the chimney and pulls out a gun that he's hidden there.

Steve goes to the basement to bring Sookie and Hugo some water and explains some of his plans for war to them, using the phrase, "Bring it on." Apparently, this episode is all a thinly veiled jab at the Bush Doctrine. Interesting. Anyway, Sookie hisses at Steve that Jesus would be ashamed of him, but Steve scoffs that he's not the monster that the vampire-loving media makes him out to be. Hugo, eager to get out of the basement, blurts out the Dallas vamps' plans to infiltrate and that Sookie Stackhouse here is a telepath and blah blah blah. Steve realizes that Sookie is Jason's sister and excuses himself, taking his goon Gabe with him. Sookie yells at Hugo for exposing them then sends a mental Twitter to Barry, asking him to tell Bill that she and Hugo and Godric are in serious trouble.

Bill and Lorena are still awake even though it's daytime and are starting to bleed. Bill begs Lorena to let him find someone who will go to Sookie if she won't let him go, but Lorena explains that she is involved because Eric asked her to be because he wants Sookie and Bill should just let him have her. Bill is not pleased.

Jason, worried about the fallout from Sarah's confession to Steve, walks briskly through the camp with his bags. Steve rides up next to him in his Escalade and Gabe tosses him in.

Andy, his arm in a cast, is trying to tell Sheriff Bud about Maryann's orgy, but his credibility is kind of shot. Don't you hate it when your alcoholic breakdown coincides with your town's demonic possession?

Tara and Eggs are watching a movie when Maryann walks in, her feet bloody, carrying a rabbit she killed. Maryann gushes that she spent the night outside communing with her animal nature, which is...kind of the truth, I guess. She leaves to go make rabbit stew and Tara mumbles that Maryann is so fucking weird. Oh, and look! The sky is blue! WELCOME TO EARTH, TARA! Eggs agrees but gushes about how great it is. Yes, these two need to quit smoking weed for a little bit.

Away from the camp, Gabe holds a knife to Jason's neck while Steve grills him. Jason, of course, thinks this is about Sarah and weeps that he's weak. Steve screams at him for choosing "them" and Jason finally realizes that they're not talking about the same thing. Steve yells that he knows who Jason is working for and Jason, puzzled, says, "The road crew?" Steve hisses that Jason is snakier than a snake in the grass, which is pretty snaky, and that he should say a prayer because he is going to hell today. He orders Gabe to take care of Jason.

Sam goes to the dock and finds Daphne. He points his gun at her but Daphne isn't concerned about dying. Sam screams that he trusted her and how could she do this to her own kind? Daphne explains that Maryann gave her new life with no fear and no limits, just love, and that Maryann is after Sam because he got away and she can't control him. Supernatural beings have to go to her on their own free will. Sam finally asks what Maryann is and Daphne, jumping into the water, bluntly states that Maryann is God.

Hugo's claustrophobia overwhelms him and he starts screaming to be released. Sookie tries to calm him down and grabs his arm. She gets a flash, a la The Dead Zone, of Hugo being blessed by Steve and listening to her plans to infiltrate. A ha! We have our rat!

Back at the dock, Daphne explains that Maryann has many different names, like Lilith, Isis, Gaia, Dionysis, even Satan. But really she's just a kind of energy; love, anger, lust, excess...all the fun stuff. She's also immortal (duh) and Sam will never win against her. Pondering this, Sam asks if he gives himself over will she go away. Daphne doubts it because Maryann is having too much fun.

Hugo, now calm, snots that human love for vampires is just addiction, that people change their lives for them. He begged Isabel to turn him but he insists that she won't because they don't want humans to be equals to them. Sookie asks that if the Newlins care so much about Hugo, then why is he still in the basement. I'll tell ya why, Hugo. You're just a fangbanging traitor to them. Neener neener.

The Newlins are welcoming people to the lock in. Steve asks to talk to Sarah in private about Jason.

Gabe drags Jason into the woods. He says some not so nice things about Jason's mother and sister, so Jason proceeds to kick the ever-loving shit out of Gabe.

Lafayette is on the phone in the ladies' room with an old client and it appears that he will have little difficulty reentering the V market. Arlene arrives and drags Tara to the bathroom, where they find Lafayette. They point out to Lafayette that this is the ladies' room, so Lafayette snaps back asking what those skank hos are doing in there. Ha! I'd say that his pizazz is coming back. Andy was concerned about that last week. He leaves and Arlene tells Tara that she blacked out last night, which piques Tara's interest, and that she might've had her way with Terry, but she doesn't remember anything.

Lafayette, who is wearing a very nice "Bitch" shirt, spots Eggs at the bar and notes that ain't nothing good can come outta something so pretty. Andy storms in and screams for Terry. Tara asks him what's wrong but Andy says that he won't talk to a devil worshipper and that he saw what they were all doing last night. He storms out and Arlene guffaws at his behavior and his alcoholic stench, but Sam is a little freaked out by Andy's knowledge.

As Jessica wakes up, Hoyt is decorating the room with roses and blood-scented candles. He wants their first time to be perfect. Jessica smiles and tells him to just take his pants off. She's a straight-shooter.

Jason is still running through the woods but is chased by Sarah. She gets out and accuses Jason of forcing her to break her vows to her husband and betraying the church. THEN SHE SHOOTS HIM OMGWTF. But the previews spoil this shocker because apparently it was just a paint gun.

Maryann meets Daphne at the dock, kisses her, thanks her for her service, then steps aside so that a black-eyed Eggs can stab her in the chest.

Gabe arrives in the basement and starts beating up Hugo. Sookie, instead of just escaping when she can because she's hell-bent on giving me a stroke every week, jumps on Gabe and screams to leave them alone.

Bill tries to make a run for it but Lorena promises that she will end him. They have another flashback to 1935, when Bill admitted that he didn't love Lorena. She says that he never tried, but he insists that he spent decades trying. He begs to be let go, but Lorena says that without her he will be alone forever. Bill retorts that she's the one who's afraid of that because she is the saddest loneliest creature that he's ever known. He starts to thrust a broken table leg into his chest but Lorena, crying, stops him and releases him. Back in the present day, Barry has arrived to give Bill Sookie's message. Lorena keeps hold of him, but Eric hears the message and swooshes away.

Gabe continues attacking Sookie and rips her clothes off, threatening to rape her, but he is pulled off. Not by Bill, not by Jason, not by Eric, but by Godric. How'd he get out? And if he could escape...why didn't he just do that? Eh, I guess we'll find out.

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Having to wait each week is AGONY!!!

And am I the only one who wanted to comfort Eric when he was upset about Godric....because there are a few things I could think of doing to him that might take his mind off things......


Thank you for saying that Sookie is kind of a pain in the ass. YES SHE IS. But I still keep watching.


I missed you last week!

Just Shireen

then sends a mental Twitter to Barry, asking him to tell Bill that she and Hugo and Godric are in serious trouble.

Hee, I loved this. Mental Twitter. Heh.


Is a mental Twitter, better or worse than sending Good Vibes. "I sent you a mental Twitter, didn't you get it?" I loved this too. This will be my response to everything now.


Anyone notice that Maryann's bloody feet looked decidedly MALE in closeup?


Another awesome recap Kdiddy. You are my Monday highlight.

Later I saw a preview on HBO that kind of gave away major points for the rest of the season. WTF HBO? I felt like I was watching bootleg spoilers.


Mental Twitter? LOVE.


Seriously, these recaps are longer than some of the books! Not complaining, but MAN all this happens in an hour? That's amazing.

Fawn Amber

Right? Gross. I thought it was going to be some new male character, but no. And may I just say - Godric? SLURP. Very cute.

Suzy Q

I missed you last week! And now I have no more HBO. Stupid Comcast.


Seriously. Right there with you. Or Godric for that matter. Yum.

On another note, anyone know whose hand that was that pulled Barry into a hotel room after he'd passed on the message to Bill?

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