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Gossip Rag Wednesday: Angelina Hateration Edition

Img205This week's crop of tabloids, released to the newstands just today, and sanitized for your protection.

This week is not Angelina's week, people.

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Note: "Jolie"? And yet Aniston is "Jen" and Pitt is "Brad"? Hmm. You're sneaky with the mind games, US Magazine bullet-pointer, I'll give you that.

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Who's got the SAD FACE? Mister I-Got-Shut-Out-Of-The-Adoption, that's who! Aww!

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People Magazine: We WILL depress the hell out of you, but at least we didn't cover Angelina this week.... Oh and PS, Demi's hotter than ever!

GAH.

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Wow, Life&Style, don't hold back or anything. Why don't you just go ahead and call her a nasty ho-bag skank and be done with it already? SHEESH.

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Zzzzzzz....

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You know, funnily enough, Feeling Humongous, Craving A Normal Sex Life, and "Give Me As Many Drugs As Possible" is a pretty accurate summary of my current life situation. Huh.

Aside to the tabloids: Please coordinate your feature stories better and refrain from all covering THE SAME STUPID, LAME-ASS STORY, WITH ONLY SLIGHT VARIATION, THE SAME WEEK. Thank you and good day. I SAID GOOD DAY.

Previously on Gossip Rag Wednesday...

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Comments

Bill

Wow, when did Jennifer Aniston start looking cross-eyed? Or is it just me seeing that (especially in the first picture)?

Kate

They really did use the same cross-eyed deer in the headlights photo of Jen every time! Maybe it's supposed to make her look vulnerable...?

Erin

"You know, funnily enough, Feeling Humongous, Craving A Normal Sex Life, and "Give Me As Many Drugs As Possible" is a pretty accurate summary of my current life situation. Huh."

Omigod, thank you for that. Snortpee.

michele

is there anyone who still gives a fuck about brad, angelina, or jen? i mean really.

where did lena go? i am sad that she is no longer listed as a contributor.

Sweetney

Michele - I agree, hence zzzzz....

Lena got a full time job. I blame The Man.

Issa

Next thing you know, they'll be saying she is pregnant with 8 babies at once. Oh wait, that's already been done. Hmmm.

Issa

Hey Sweetney, did you hear that they just canceled Dollhouse?

Sweetney

Issa - Yep. Crying shame. Though... saw that one coming, right?

Fox, man.

Issa

Of course now that I said that, I'm not thinking it was you who was so in love with it. Sigh.

Please excuse the multiple comments. I blame it on the fever.

Sweetney

Issa -- No, I was in love with it. Wrote a huge piece on it for BlogHer. But the way things were going this season, I knew this was coming. Sad, but not surprised, I guess.

Issa

Okay at least I know I wasn't delirious.

DianaCLT

"My Big Secret Levi Johnston Interview"????

"Exclusive Mind Games"?????

Huh. Me thinks the tabs need to reconfigure the way they word things.

Jen

I hate to say it, but I would almost rather here about Jen, Angelina, and Brad than those two pregnant whores. Nasty.

HomeValley

Are Jon and Kate really not on these covers? Praise Jesus!




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