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Apparently Gisele Bündchen Is Actually Superhuman

Smug_gisele_thumb  As if being impossible looking all the time isn't enough for her, Gisele also would like the world to know that she can give birth painlessly without medication.

In an interview for a Brazilian television show, Gisele smarmed: "[Childbirth] wasn't painful, not even a little bit. The whole time, my head was so focused – every contraction, the baby is closer, the baby is closer. So, it wasn't like, 'Oh, what pain.' It was, 'With every contraction, he is getting closer to me.' " 

Look how smug she looks. Admit it, you want to hit her. 

She also reports that she didn't need to wear maternity clothes at all during her pregnancy and, two days after giving birth, she was up making pancakes and doing dishes. Well, isn't that just special! Thank you, Gisele, for make it impossible for all other women on earth to feel good about themselves ever again.

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Someone to add to my list of celebrities who I want to punch...


I found her comments super annoying... Loved the part where she talks about newborn waking up every 2 hours ... she made it sounds like she had discover a new planet and was teaching all of us about it

Jen O.

Why don't celebrities ever complain about their kids? It's like they think we don't know their lying. Because that's all it is. They're a bunch of lying liars who lie about their kids being perfect. I don't hate her. I just know she's a liar.


Yay Jen O.! Thanks for saying it better than I could have.


She is a whore and probably a robot. I hate her.

And I haven't even had to go through the terror of pushing a child out my girlybits. I'm just pissed for everyone who has.

cindy w

I would like to nominate Gisele to be the spokesmodel for STFU Parents.


A lot of people have low pain or pain free births. Hypnobirthing even allows you to teach yourself to do it. Our culture terrorizes women about birth, making it a self-fulfulling prophecy that they will be miserable. Then they perpetuate the cycle, telling their horror stories and making the next pregnant woman terrified of birth. I am glad that she discussed her pleasant birth - but very sad to see women everywhere joking about violence and wishing her misery. I try to tell my pleasant drug-free birth story when possible to try to counteract some of what our culture pushes on us and let people know that there are alternatives to misery. I hate to think that people have been wanting to punch me for it.




So, if I tell anyone that I gave birth to a 12 pound, 3 ounce baby without painkillers, and that the head coming out part didn't hurt, honestly, even though the contractions beforehand hurt like a mother, that gives you the right to want to punch me in the face? Seriously? You would hate me because I got through two labors without pain medication? Gee whillikers, you are openminded.

Women complain about how women are judged unfairly in our culture, and yet usually it's the women judging other women. So a model who doesn't look like the rest of us had a great birth experience. Good for her. Isn't that what we want for all moms? Celebs--and, I assume, us regular mortals--are only supposed to talk about their birth experiences if they were miserable and pain-filled?

And I supposed you would also want to punch me if I told you my firstborn slept four hours at a stretch from the get-go, and potty trained at two years old. Because moms are not supposed to have GOOD TIMES in the parenting realm on our planet. It is all supposed to be woe and misery, according to the momoblogosphere. We are supposed to suffer and have horrible times and then mine that for blogging material, I suppose.


Apologies for the spelling error in the last paragraph. "I supposed" should read "I suppose".


Karen and Leah. I don't think people want to punch you in the face because you're normal people who had pleasant births.

I think all the ire comes from the way Gisele talks about all of this as if she has ascended to the highest form of humanity and is the first woman to truly master childbirth, thereby making it her celestial mission to enlighten the poor masses about it.

Somehow, that rubs people the wrong way. Go figure!



That is all.


We hate a celebrity for finally talking about birth like it is a positive, wonderful thing that can be endured without intervention? Way to go, gals.


My personal experience with the birth of my twins included a great deal of pain. I'm glad some of you were able to avoid that. I think what gets people (me) about Giselle's comments is the delicious hubris. Would it kill one celebrity to simply say, "I was very lucky. I didn't experience a lot of pain. I know some women do and I'm in awe of their courage. It's tough. Also, I'm super lucky that I have an am/pm nurse, a trainer, a chef, and a housekeeper. I have no idea what I'd do if I had to work 50 hours a week and take care of the kids and my family on my own."

It just seems to diminish a "normal" woman's contribution to her family. It's judgemental and puts more emphasis on what we can't or don't do. Sorry, but I think she had an opportunity to raise women up and she blew it. It's all about her.

Meh...she's a blip. Her whole personal life kind of grosses me out anyway.


I also had a pain-free unmedicated birth like she described, so I know it's possible. Sad that so many people have made up their minds that it MUST be a terrible experience. BUT I do agree that we could do without Giselle's smugness. And I think it's sad that she is so focused on being the super-robot-mom that she didn't even get the first few days to lounge around and cuddle and stare at her precious new baby :(


Smug-ness aside, I don't know if I even believe she actually did get up the next day to do the dishes and make pancakes. That sounds like a lot of good publicity spin.


OMG I can't even believe people are arguing about this. That was a smug, holier-than-thou comment. It was and it's got nothing to do with anyone else's pain-free birth.

Guess what? Childbirth hurts. It does. It's not said to terrify other women, it's the truth. I had my second child med-free after a botched epidural with my first and contractions really hurt. They really *really* hurt. But the pushing part felt good. No ring of fire, no nothing, just blessed relief that I could finally push. Loved that part! And the next day I was up and moving around like normal - it was GREAT!

It was also very abnormal. It doesn't usually work that way and I was lucky! Having been on the other side of delivery with my first, I was able to fully appreciate just how lucky I was to have that experience with my second.

But this chick? She's just bragging. And that's not cool. And that's why everyone wants to punch her. Because sometimes? People need punching.

Amy H

Her smugness is what bothers me the most. I love when celebrities acknowledge the help they have. I love when they say "I am fortunate to have a nanny and a trainer." That was one of the things I loved about Oprah when she was losing weight--she NEVER let us forget that she wasn't doing it alone.

I think it is superfantastic that there are those that have had a pain free birth. I didn't experience that and because of my emergency c-section I was not up and moving around well for 2 weeks. But even if I had been fortunate enough (and it is fortune, by the way) to have a natural birth, I don't think I would have been up doing dishes and making pancakes 2 days later. Just sayin.


What a disappointment to see such attitudes from MamaPop staff and readers, people whose stories and comments usually make my day.

I'm currently 6 1/2 months pregnant. I still fit into most of my pre-pregnancy clothes.

I'm also currently taking classes and am aiming for a Bradley Birth. A method that promotes drug-free childbirth, and often times mothers who end up feeling well enough to get up and walk after delivery. I would LOVE it if I could make pancakes for my family two days after giving birth-I enjoy cooking and doing nice things for the people I love. You don't like cooking-then don't do it. It's a choice. I doubt Tom stood in the kitchen and said, 'woman, make me pancakes.' Could it be (GASP) that she wanted to make pancakes?

Birth is different EVERY SINGLE TIME for EVERY SINGLE WOMAN. I doubt, without the full text of the interview, we can judge her on whether or not she is attempting to be smug. Which, if you read carefully (the CNN article) said that the birth was without serious pain medication-NOT completely free, which is what your article implies. She also admits in the full article that she has help from her mother-so those bashing her for trying to 'do-it-all,' it's a bit uncalled for.

Does she probably have someone grocery shopping for her, cleaning her bathrooms, filling up her car with gas? Yes. Do I want to punch her for that, along with the kajillions of dollars she makes, and the privileged life she lives? You bet your pretty MamaPop tush I do. Would I trade her life for mine? Not once in a million years.

Just becuase hearing she had a pleasant birth experience makes you feel self-conscious about your choices in life doesn't mean she's lying, or deserves to be ridiculed for talking about her experiences. Be proud in how you got to this point in your life!

Snarky Amber

To the readers who think that a) I actually wish violence on Gisele, a person I've never met; b) I am really so insecure that my self-image rests entirely upon what a Brazilian supermodel looks like, thinks or does; c) I hate all women who had painless births or did not gain a lot of weight during pregnancy, etc: OMG grow a sense of humor.

The point of this completely tongue-in-cheek post was to illustrate out how perfect-in-every-way Gisele seems and to point out that, because many men uphold her as the ideal woman, the imaginary bar to which all other women can sometimes feel they are measured is set even higher.

It is merely my attempt poke fun at that natural tendency we sometimes have to resent women we perceive as "perfect," even knowing that no one really is perfect. Lighten up?


Amber, I think there is a difference between needing to "grow a sense of humor" and trying to challenge someone's preconceptions by giving them new info they're apparently not aware of.

I'm not thrilled with the insults flying everywhere in these comments. But I guess given our cultural perception of birth=fear/pain I can't be too surprised. I just wish that people were a tad less dismissive about others who try to help people open their eyes about alternatives.

Not everything is funny from every perspective. That doesn't mean people don't have a sense of humor or are otherwise too serious. It means that they have a different perspective than you do.


Amber, there is no possible universe in which I think Gisele is perfect. I just think it's interesting that people are saying things like "bitch" or "I want to punch her" when she talks about her childbirth experience, and these are probably the same people who are horrified by actual violence against women. Interesting, no?

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