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James Van Der Beek Still Relevant; Miss Banshee's Mind Blown

Thebeek  You know, I thought we left the Beek behind with the 90s, back when my college roommates and I would play the Dawson's Creek drinking game and guzzle Boone's Strawberry Hill whenever the Beek's wonky eye was especially noticeable. But this week has brought not one but TWO Beek-related stories, and I guess I have to admit that yes. The Beek is still relevant.

I've got to give The Beek credit. He went from a toolish college kid in my hometown (dude wore a beret, y'all. UNIRONICALLY,) to a household name with the inexplicably popular teen angst drama Dawson's Creek. The young stars of "The Creek" went on to do some pretty good work: Michelle Williams works all the time, and of course shares a child with the late Heath Ledger. Joshua Jackson, who will ALWAYS be Pacey Witter to me, is now on his second season of Fringe, a halfway decent sci-fi show, and that chick who played Little Joey Potter? Married a midget from the planet Xenu and got crazy famous (and crazy-crazy.) So all in all, those "Creek" kids did pretty well for themselves, and good for them.

But what of James Van Der Beek? He slipped off the radar after "The Creek" ended, probably hoping to shed the reputation of being "Dawson Leery," one of the most meglo-maniacal, unlikable whiny britches characters to ever be written into a script. So, like so many teen "stars," the world forgot about the Beek. Well, MY friends never did. We haven't been in college for 10 years now, and The Beek is STILL funny to us, but then again, we drank a lot in college, and brain damage isn't entirely out of the question.

Then, out of nowhere, The Beek showed up on one of MamaPop's favorite shows, How I Met Your Mother, as a washed up Canadian musician that Robin Sparkles had crushed on for decades. And he was funny! Self-deprecating, showing off the hairline that had been slowly but surely receding throughout the years on "The Creek," and playing a douchey character that actually made me laugh, and that's saying a LOT, because there is no love lost between The Beek and I.

That brings us to Tuesday, wherein TMZ got their mitts on the divorce papers between Mr and Mrs The Beek, and it turns out that ol' Fivehead makes $49,343.00 A MONTH.

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

Oh, and it gets even more embarrassing for your humble writer, who made making fun of The Beek an ART FORM back in the dorms of Emerson College, way back in 1998. The Beek? Reportedly gives over $4,000 a month to charity.

Mea culpa, Dawson.

AND THEN!!!!!! I'm innocently watching television and a commercial for the mediocre hospital drama Mercy comes on. And who has recently gotten some hair plugs, trimmed down, looks...good?!? And has joined the cast? James Van Der Beek. As a cocky, (I cannot believe I am typing this) SEXY doctor. On network television. My mind? Blown.

So, hey, James. Do you mind if I call you James? Yeah, that doesn't sound right to me either. Say, Beek, good on you. Sorry about your divorce, but it looks like you're turning your career (and your hairdo, thank Jebuddah) around, and maybe, JUST MAYBE I'll stop making fun of you.

Okay, that's never going to happen. But kudos to the charity thing. You're a good egg, Beeker, but I'm only human, and THIS is how I will always remember you:

Dawsons-ugly-cry

I'm not a nice person, am I? No, I'm not.

source


. . . . .
Miss Banshee has drunkenly watched every single episode of The Creek. More than once.







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Comments

Larissa

I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!

This was so nice, and I know how hard that is for you when it comes to The Beek.

Now I have to go and get ready to snatch up a newly single Dawson.

Jennie

He was also on One Tree Hill last year. Uh....I heard. I don't know personally or anything, definitely not.

katie | motherbumper

I think I'm going to print out that last picture because that IS the Beek to me.

jodifur

He was on The Today this morning. Not the real one, the fake one with Kathie Lee and Hoda.

It is a snow day and I was flipping channels.

Tita B

So, you're saying that there's a reason now to watch/drink to Mercy? The Beek inspires drinking games with every acting gig.

"I don't want your life!" - varsity blues

Clarabella

I always thought the highlight of his career was when he played a drug addict, IT genius, schizophrenic serial killer on Criminal Minds, but, hey, that's just me.
Also, PAAACEY!

ljpock

I just want to second Clarabella's

"PAAAAACEY!"

kdiddy

He was also in The Rules of Attraction which is kind of the shit.

Sada

For the record, I never drank Boone's Strawberry Hill during Creek nights. It was Seagram's gin and tonics in a Big Gulp container or NOTHING. Also? I threw up in my mouth a little when you called him "sexy." But, I begrudgingly admit that the Beek sounds like he might be... cool? Except for the part where he's on Mercy, because that show looks like a steaming pile of crap.

I wanted to make some joke about how you're growing as a person as quickly as the Beek's hair is growing on his tundra of a scalp, but it's not really working. Zing?

Leslie M.

Okay - so after reading this I had to google him. And surprisingly, he has gone from "lumpy-baked-potato-head whiny pussy" to "whoa who is that hot brunette?" How did this happen?!? BLOWS MY MIND.

Darcey

kdiddy - I love the fact you also love Rules of Attraction. One of my favorite movies from my college years.

And Varsity Blues still makes me laugh for several reasons: 1) My small-town high school was just like that (and I had a crush on a football player), 2) One of our teachers was discovered to be moonlighting elsewhere (she also happened to be my ex-aunt), and 3) the head cheerleader who was all over The Beek shares my first name, a fact none of my friends let me forget.

Muirnait

I watch Mercy, and I didn't even realize it was him at first, and then I did, and it was all, "Ohhhhhhhh!" And I engaged in even more witty and vibrant commentary. :P




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