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LOMGST! Lost You-Recap - Lighthouse

Lost-lighthouse-hurley-jackFriends, internet citizens, Lost fans, I will sadly not be able to recap Lost full and proper today due to a confluence of unfortunate, time-taxing circumstances... HOWEVER! There is MUCH to discuss, and I won't be able to sleep tonight if I don't get to WTF??? with y'all. SO.

This twitter update -- which I posted just moments after the end of last night's episode -- says it all, I think:



Okay, I'm just going to throw a few random things out here and then let you all go to town:

  • Have I ever wanted to punch Jack in the nutsack more than I did during this episode? After quiet reflection and meditation, I would have to say NO.
  • Can you even BELIEVE that shit with Claire? So if I understand it right, she's been going crazy in the jungle for 3 years, cuddling a coconut-head baby, killing Others, buddying up to Faux Locke, and basically becoming Rousseau: The Revenge? That sounds like a monkey barrel of laughs! Oh and a special shout-out of thanks to the director of this episode for gifting us with that nice, tight shot of Claire plunging an axe into that dude's chest. SPECTACULAR! [BARF.]
  • The Hugo-Jacob relationship is wigging me out a bit. What's going on there exactly? Also, how come Ghostbusters dude (Miles) can't see Jacob? And who's coming to the island now? What? Why? Huh?
  • Poor Sayid. Poor deluded, clueless, infected with darkness and creeping evil Sayid. Le sigh.
  • Jack's Father to an emo kid with Daddy issues. And this is surprising HOW?
  • The lighthouse: a numbered "wheel of fortune" (in the medieval Rota Fortunae sense, not the cheesy game show sense)? A looking glass into the past (See: Alice in Wonderland - Through The Looking Glass???)? A metaphor for the whole freaking show, with it's imperfectly mirrored alternate realities.... that have now been shattered? THANKS TO STUPID JACK? (Jack, Anger Therapy. Look into it.) And really, no one had ever NOTICED that thing sitting up there on that cliff before? Really? Phhbbbtt.
  • Do you find that drinking before/during the show helps you to understand it better? Because it's not working for me. Am I doing it wrong?

What else am I missing?

Theories? Insights? Suppositions? Wild guesses? PLEASE TO BE BRINGING IT.

Previously on Lost Recaps...

. . . . .
Sweetney is a writer, geek, and professional smartass from beautiful Baltimore, MD.

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The whole episode, all I could think about was Claire's rat's nest hair. Pull it back, girl, do something. You're looking infected.

Was not expecting her to give old dude the hatchet either. That was pretty graphic for prime time.


Miles can't SEE dead people. Only like, listen to their brains or something.

For some reason, I really enjoyed Jacob telling Hurley that sometimes you can just jump in a cab and tell some people what to do.

Also, why is that we all signed up for a six year brain fuck and we keep coming back for more? TELL ME.


@Whitney: Oh right, my bad. Miles "listens to their (dead) brains."

Wait, what?


Adventure Pug

Miles can't TALK to Jacob because Jacob's not really dead. Well, he's "Hugo See Him Dead" but not dead-dead. Like "Miles Talk to Him Dead".

Shit. Fuck. Now I've confused myself.

Fucking Lost.


I'm pretty freaked out by Claire and her dead squirrel baby. And I'm also a little confused because Rousseau had bad hair because she spent her life hiding from the temple people and the smoke monster. Claire, it seems, has been in league with Smokey since she disappeared so WHY THE BAD HAIR? Shouldn't she have been better protected?
And no I don't think that drinking helps, but to tell you the truth, I don't think I've ever even attempted to watch it completely sober, so maybe I'm not the best judge...


I watch this show with two other grown ass adults every week (no drinking involved, dumb) and last night we couldn't even discuss it. We sat there, and several times "WTF" literally came out of my mouth, but we couldn't make guesses or ridic. theories when it was over. Just... "Huh." And then got up from the couch.

I didn't mind Claire axing that dude so much because I actually thought bitch was going to shop Jin's leg off ala Misery. So the ax to the gut was actually a relief? Sad.

And seriously... Who is Jack's freaking kid? How ALTERNATE is this reality? Did it change the past before they even left Sydney, not just what happened after?

I. Are. Confused.

Michael Sippey

The writers are either incredibly smart....or incredibly stupid. This is supposed to be the season of ANSWERS, and instead they just keep feeding us QUESTIONS. (LIke "Lighthouse...seriously?") So one of two things -- they're either actually going to pull this off and actually use these new question-making things to answer some older things, or they're just using these to distract us. ("Adam and Eve? Ummmm...hey, look, Lighthouse!")


*Chop, not shop. Although clearly Claire could use a spa/mall day.


OH my GOODNESS!! So is it too obvious that I think Jacob is God and evil Lock guy is the devil?? That God wants us to have faith, not know the answers, and the evil devil wants to get in there and get you doubting and thinking only of yourself?? also is Jacks sons mom Kate?? Is this in the future?? Why does his son HAVE AN ANSWERING MACHINE!!?!?!??! ALso, I LOVE HUGO!!! I STILL THINK JACK IS SMOKING HOT!!! I can't wait until next week!!!!


Claire's hair was more barfworthy than the axing - which I totally know she was going to do, btw.

I loved the Obi-Wan/Jacob comment. That was perfect!

And yes, drinking helps. You may not be consuming enough is all.

teh Duchess

So, wait... Rousseau - infected by smokey, has curly hair; Claire - infected by smokey, has curly hair; Sayid - infected by smokey, HAS CURLY HAIR! COINCIDENCE??!?!??? ...yeah... You're probably right.

teh Duchess

Someone brought up the is Kate the mother of Jack's son while we were watching last night, but I argued that since Jack saw Kate on the plane and they didn't seem to know each other really, that probably meant they hadn't made a child together. Maybe the mother is Juliet? Just a TOTALLY random thought, but the son's eyes are SO blue just like hers.


Aside: Oh my LOLZ: http://www.fakelocke.com/


Sweetney - HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. Ha.


My partner completely blew my mind as we were falling asleep post-LOST with this tidbit:

108 (the position on the dial Jacob told Hurley to turn to) is THE SUM OF THE NUMBERS.


Aww! I've really liked Jack this season! I don't blame him at all for smashing the mirrors. He's put up with this secretive, manipulative shit for years. And now by a dead dude?!

Claire scared the ba-jeezus out of me, for reals. I'm just glad she didn't start axing the guy, like, at the feet, or something, and work her way up. *shudder*

Suzy Q

@Sarah: That was also the amount of minutes between re-sets of the computer on the first (second?) season before that station went kablooey.

OMG, where to begin with this ep? Why didn't Jin tell Claire about her own disappearing act? That her baby was found in the jungle all alone? It's only a matter of time before Claire v. Kate: The Aaroning.

Most of all, my burning question is this: Why is that ancient lighthouse cleaner than my apartment?



Oh yes, it is driving me insane that Claire is all up in arms over ANYBODY else having Aaron... I suppose she would have preferred they left him to die? Does she not remember the loony walk-off-in-the-jungle bit? I hate Kate, but man I hope Claire kicks her ass.


Ha - I mean - I hope *she* kicks *Claire's* ass.

My brain is not functioning today.

I blame LOST.


Every Wednesday I come in to work and a coworker who doesn't get to watch until later in the week asks me if Lost was good and what happened. I always find myself saying, "It was AWESOME...and .... I....I have no idea what happened." This week I got to tag on a bit about Claire's hair. So that was big news.

It's so frustrating and so AWESOME. I should probably drink more....

Michael F.

Rousseau took MUCH better care of her long jungle hair than Claire. Must have to do with being evil and all that stuff, and having no time to wash/condition when there are Others to ax bludgeon.

And having a large ferret skull in a crib for a "bayh-bee."

Michael F.

@Suzy Q: "Most of all, my burning question is this: Why is that ancient lighthouse cleaner than my apartment?"

Wasn't that just the cleanest, most spic and span ancient lighthouse sitting on the rocky humid shore of a mysterious, weird-ass island you've ever seen? I guess birds keep away from island structures.

And the walls and floor were SO clean it looked like a set from a Saturday morning version of an Indiana Jones movie (or like that temple in Spy Kids 2).


@KATIE -- It's a completely different reality. You can't change the past without changing the future. Blowing up the island in the 1970's profoundly changed everyone's future -- because it also changed their pasts. BOOM!


@TRACY: Ha ha. I guess that makes sense, if I think clearly. ;)
But - then what is the point of any of it? I want to know why I CARE about their post-70's bombed island alternate reality bodies. I want answers!!!!!!!!!
Longing for the days when I would miss the whole season and watch it all on DVD before the next season started. I need instant answers and gratification I guess!

Suzy Q

Stop fucking with my head, Tracy. It burrrrns.


My (alcohol induced) theory about the mirrors in the light house is they are the mirrors from Sleeping Beauty. When Jack asked who was the fairest of them all on the island, and the mirror replied "Sawyer" , Jack smashed that bitch to pieces.

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