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Snooki and JWOWW Only WISH They Were Proper Guidettes. Wannabes.

Jwoww_snooki_thumb Snooki and JWOWW of Jersery Shore fame only WISH they could rightfully lay claim to the high status of guidette (pronounced gwee-dett), but they cannot.

Why? JWOWW let it slip on an episode of FoxNews.com's The Strategy Room that neither she nor Snooki are even Italian, as they would have had us believe with all their proud guidette posturing on MTV over the past many months. It seems that the inflati-boobs, the Bump-Its, and the New Jersey high life were just too alluring for these two non-Italians to pass up.

It turns out that JWOWW is actually Spanish-Irish and that Snooki is Chilean.

Jwoww_snooki 

Well, colour me surprised. JWOWW's boobs are not peaking in from a zero-gravity plane, Snooki does not have a massive growth on the back of her head, and their proud ownership of the term "guidette" over the first season of Jersey Shore was for shit.

The program has been criticized for its promotion of negative and misleading stereotypes of Italian-Americans, and now that we know that two of the worst offenders aren't even Italian, all of the offended parties can now stand righteous in their vitriol against the orange-skinned, gym-tan-laundry-ing cheeseheads of Jersey Shore.

I really do think I must make it clear, though, that I have a deep and abiding love for Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi. She's this 4-foot-9-inch mess of hair extensions, fake-n-bake, and frosted lipstick, so she's kind of like a Polly Pocket/Bratz doll hybrid gone very wrong, but so far wrong that she's kind of almost right again, except that she's not, so she's probably evil and working in tandem with Lady Gaga to steal my brain, but she's the kind of evil that can do handsprings for more than half a city block on sand, and that's something:

Gooooooooo, Snooki! (Even if you are Chilean guidette wannabe).

UPDATE: According to @grownupteenager, Snooki was adopted by an Italian family, so she's a guidette by nurture, it turns out. Thanks for the info!

[source]

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Schmutzie thinks that people of both Spanish-Irish and Chilean descents are justified if they want to register their complaints now.







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Comments

txtingmrdarcy

According to the new DNA evidence released about King Tut, he would basically have looked exactly like Snooki. And his parents were siblings. Go figure.

Rhonda

I love the Snookers. I want to put her in my pocket.

The Guido's go 'fishing' to look for girls. So my husband gave me a chocolate fish for valentines day that says 'your a keeper'. Hee. He's my ultimate Guido...in a good way.

guida

Am I the only one that wants to break the TV when I hear the word Guidette? The female version of the name Guido is Guida (if we're following the rules of Italian or Spanish, for the Chileans in the hizzle). The suffix 'ette' is diminutive from the French.... and I thought these women were SMART. eesh.

rebecca

i am so in love with Snooki...

iambellaluna

But have you been to the east coast and SEEN this phenomena? I mean even before the show there were the emails about getting them off long island. Fo real. I don't see how anyone of any anscestory can escape living the lifestyle. And also, I've always been wondering if they were italian since they don't have that "look." I know it seems weird.

Apryl's Antics

I honestly was having a hard time wrapping Italian around Snookie.




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