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Predators Has Sneak Peek Footage. Avatar Reference.

Predator_robert_rodriguez-294x300  Robert Rodriguez showed some sneak peak footage of Predators, the movie he is producing, at South-by-Southwest this week and I don't mean the compass orientation... I mean the film festival which, if you think about it, makes this whole article a lot more newsworthy for a pop culture site than if he was just standing somewhere facing the direction South-by-Southwest and talking. That wouldn't be news at all.  

Predators, as you probably guessed because you are a genius, is another "re-boot" of a classic action movie, made by a creatively-bankrupt Hollywood machine bent on ringing every last dime they can out of our childhood. Oh no wait! Rodriguez says it's to introduce a new generation of viewers to an exciting franchise. Whew! That's a relief! That first thing was really cynical.

 Even though there are no governors of either California or Minnesota in the re-boot, it does have Adrian Brody, who apparently has decided to abandon his nearly-illustrious career as a respected actor in favor of another action flick opposite a giant "something" that tries to kill everyone. (King Kong was the start of this alarming trend.) I hope he doesn't land on his nose as he falls from grace because HAHAHAHA!! It's sooooo BIG! Get it? (*covers own nose*) 

I guess the horrifically nonsensical Alien vs. Predator movies weren't enough to kill this franchise. So in some respects the film itself is a metaphor for an actual movie monster in that, no matter how evil it becomes, you simply can't kill it. I would have thought after your sequel is only able to attract Danny Glover to star in it you're pretty much done. Having Danny Glover be your premiere talent...the one that you are counting on to drive ticket sales, is like buying a Formula One race car and putting a gerbil on a exercise wheel in for the motor. No offense to Danny Glover, because he DID get to shoot the South African bad guy who kept hollering "Diplomatic Immunity!" in Lethal Weapon 2, and for that brilliant edition to the cultural consciousness he gets a lifetime pass. But Predator 2 WAS a big pile of shit. 

Also starring in Predators is Lawrence Fishburne or what looks like an alien who skinned Lawrence Fishburne and is trying to wear him like a disguise. My mom says I shouldn't say mean things about people for their physical appearance, and that's sage advice coming from that dumpy bitch. Also if you're going to call a movie Predators and it's going to star scary-looking Larry Fishburne, I'm totally expecting the opening scene to be his white, non-nondescript, van parked in front of an elementary school.

So here's the sneak peak. I like the cool Sammael-from-Hellboy** looking Predator that is just a computer mock-up at this point. The more things they can get in there that look like dinosaurs or like they come from the magical world of Pandora* the better.


"Does this still frame make my nose look big?", Adrian asked

 *It's an Avatar reference, because including it in this post means I get to use "Avatar" as a keyword, and let's face it...that's the only way I'm getting people to read this shit. Chicanery and an exhaustive use of misdirection.

** This is Sammael. He also looks like something out of Avatar. That keyword is SOOO justified now.


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Didn't they do 2 Alien vs. Predators? Exactly how many times would they like to reintroduce Predator to a new generation?

Also, the old Predator is still fucking scary looking. The new one's cool, but it's hard to wipe out the brand and start over when you just made 2 movies using the old Predator. I'm not sure how I feel about it. I'll think about it for the next several hours.

I'm going to watch it, is what I'm trying to tell you.


My first thought is, "Why would they want to redo this (again)? The first one was so good. With Arnold and Jesse and the Predator was badass. It is still really good."

Then, I'm all, "I'm going to see this and love it probably."

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