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Ashton Kutcher Is A Pirate (Rhythm Still Not A Dancer, Though)

Ashton_kutcher Ashton Kutcher says he's going to 'pirate' his own movie Killers.  What?

It must be tough being a  ridiculously good-looking take-no-prisoners rogue like Ashton Kutcher.  Aside from the privilege of being married to a cyborg and keeping a steady movie career going while hawking digital cameras, he's really living on the edge of something or other.

Because now Ashton Kutcher is taking his place alongside digital freedom fighters everywhere.

A recent tweet of his said he'd be "going live 2 the web & pirating the 1st ten min of Killers from the premiere".  In other words, a crappy shakycam stream from the audience.

Take that, MPAA! You're getting punked!  With 48 hours notice!

Except it's the rest of us on the punk end of the deal, obviously.  Kutcher's performance is a profoundly unsavvy marketing move from Lionsgate, who have declined to screen Killers for critics.  This is tantamount to running naked down Wiltshire Boulevard on Friday afternoon screaming "Our movie sucks!"  One can only imagine the room of damp-pitted executives scratching at their skulls as they attempt to finesse their way out of the looming tsunami of disaster, until one of them mumbles "Hey... that Kutcher guy... he's big on the Twitter, right?"


The alternative, too terrible to contemplate, is that all this was written up in a marketing strategy by some eager up-and-comer with his or her tongue finger on the anus pulse of the new realities of the digital age.  I kind of hope that the MPAA decides to sue Kutcher and Lionsgate, just so future generations can remember 2010 as the year that the Gulf of Mexico died while the rest of the world distracted itself with legal battles over Katherine Heigl movies.

Palinode is not a dancer.

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Comments

norm

Oh dear Bob, "tongue on the anus of the new realities of the digital age" is going to have me in stitches for hours.

Palinode

@norm - It's important to have your tongue on the right anus in this day and age.

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah

Fuck.

I was under the impression that rhythm was a dancer ALL THIS TIME.

This is bullshit.

*flips table over. stomps away*




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