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Boobs Archive

April 15, 2010

There Are So Many Things Wrong With This Cover, I Don't Know Where To Start

Life and Style coverPunch #1 to the nuts of feminism: Kim Kardashian has lost 5 lbs in 5 days to exact revenge on her former boyfriend, Reggie Bush, for moving on too quickly.  Because that's healthy.  Not just the pound-a-day diet, the idea that she needed to get skinnier to make her ex jealous. 

And that's just the beginning of wrongness that is splattered all over the place with this week's Life & Style cover.


April 14, 2010

Sigourney Weaver, My Breasts And I Have A Bone To Pick With You

Sigourney-weaver  Copy this one down for the WTF files. Sigourney Weaver has not only betrayed the sisterhood of women in film, who have been sorely underrepresented since the medium was invented, but has lauded and sung the praises of one Mr. James "I'm A Douche" Cameron IN PLACE OF standing up for her fellow woman. I cannot believe I am even reporting this.


April 02, 2010

Flashback Friday - Are You There God? Edition

Are-you-there-god-its-me-margaret book cover Judy Blume  Today's Flashback Friday is brought to you by interfaith marriage and feminine hygiene products.


April 01, 2010

Madonna is a Hypocrite

Madonna-daughter-lourdes Madonna wants her 13 year old daughter, Lourdes, to dress more conservatively.


I myself am the parent of a young girl. I agree with the sentiment that thirteen year olds shouldn't dress like sluts. However, I do not feel like this particular woman has a leg to stand on.


March 31, 2010

Kim Kardashian - Put On This Earth To Make Us Feel Like Troll Dolls

Kim Kardashian skirtThanks a lot, Kim.  Now I sort of feel guilty for eating those four perogies, two cabbage rolls, a shishkabob, bun and coleslaw for lunch.   


FTBC and the Sexification of Breast Cancer

Claudia Schiffer Fashion Targets Breast Cancer FTBC UK campaignFashion Targets Breast Cancer is an organization dedicated to raising awareness and funds in support of breast cancer research, education, and patient care whose beginning in 1994 was sparked by Ralph Lauren's loss of his friend Nina Hyde to the disease. FTBC is touted as "...the worldwide fashion community's singular and most successful response to breast cancer."

Yay for them. I still hate how they promote it.


March 30, 2010

On Sexiness, "It" and Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive Competition: Helen Mirren v. Megan Fox

Sexy isn't something that can be defined.  There are no measurable values, no constants, not one attempt at defining the word is indisputable.  Every individual definition is disputable.  It's preference, it's what makes your heart thump, your pulse quicken, your pupils dilate.  There's a slight rush of blood to one's head, causing rosy cheeks.  The hands moisten.  You're in the presence of "it."


March 19, 2010

J-Lo Has Gone "Overboard"

J_lo_on_a_boat The first time I read that Jennifer Lopez had signed on to do a remake of "Overboard" I dismissed it.

That is silly, thought I. Sure, "Overboard" is funny, but it is only funny because of Goldie Hawn's delivery. Other than that it is a stupid, and dated movie.

But then I saw the rumor again, and it was all - Will Smith is producing a remake of "Overboard" and is in talks with J-Lo.


March 18, 2010

Please Explain This Outfit, Kim Kardashian

Picture 7  Kim, I'm still not really sure why you're famous. People have explained it to me but all I hear is blahblahblah Bruce Jenner blah blah boobs. But whatever. you know what you're famous for now? Having kinda bad taste in clothes. Exhibit 3204923408:


March 12, 2010

Kendra Wilkinson: Plaster Caster of BOOBS

Kendra-Wilkinson-boobs  Kendra Wilkinson has some big ol' boobs. In fact, after having a baby her boobs are so big that she is considering having a breast reduction.

But not before she makes a cast of the old rack.


March 09, 2010

16 and Pregnant Preview: Chelsea and Adam

16_and_pregnant Another episode of 16 and Pregnant, another opportunity to tear your hair out. This week, we meet Chelsea and Adam.


February 17, 2010

Spartacus: Blood and Sand — The Olympics of Sex and Decapitation

Spartacus_Blood_and_Sand Work with me here. You may have heard through the grapevine that there's some kind of sports... something... going on in Vancouver. Which is apparently in Canada. Extensive research tells us that these sports... things... are called the Winter Olympics, and apparently in some circles they're kind of a big deal. Skiing may be involved, as well as something that involves brooms. The broom thing may be apocryphal, however, so don't hold us to it. All of this, of course, leads us into a discussion of Starz' brand spankin' new series of swords, sandals and - yes - softcore porn, Spartacus: Blood and Sand.


Snooki and JWOWW Only WISH They Were Proper Guidettes. Wannabes.

Jwoww_snooki_thumb Snooki and JWOWW of Jersery Shore fame only WISH they could rightfully lay claim to the high status of guidette (pronounced gwee-dett), but they cannot.

Why? JWOWW let it slip on an episode of FoxNews.com's The Strategy Room that neither she nor Snooki are even Italian, as they would have had us believe with all their proud guidette posturing on MTV over the past many months. It seems that the inflati-boobs, the Bump-Its, and the New Jersey high life were just too alluring for these two non-Italians to pass up.


Hey Look! It is Lady Gaga's Butt.

BRIT-Awards-Lady-Gaga-awards Last night at the BRIT Awards, Lady Gaga decided to moon all of us for a really long time.

(pictures of her ass after the break)

I know you people all love Lady Gaga so I won't be cruel, but, um, put on some clothes, Lady.


February 12, 2010

Carrie Prejean and Kyle Boller Engaged!

Boller-prejean Everyone's favorite surgically enhanced, anti-gay marriage, sex-tape making, evangelical Christian, Larry King backtalker dethroned beauty queen is getting married! To a football player! How American of her.


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