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Requiem Archive


June 25, 2010

Michael Jackson -- One Year Later

Michael-jackson  One year ago today I was sitting in a terrible college summer dinner theater performance, killing my iPhone battery from relentless under-the-table Googling and scrolling through a deluge of "Michael Jackson is dead" updates on Tweetie. 

My mind was blown. It was a weird day. Farrah died. Michael died. Scroll scroll scroll. 

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June 24, 2010

Tupac and R.E.M. are Officially History

Tupac-afeni-shakur  You may know you're getting up in years when the music that had a major impact on your generation and your own little life is deemed historically significant. 

That's what the Library of Congress is saying about Tupac and R.E.M. So thanks, Library of Congress. Because you know this is really all about my mortality. 

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June 10, 2010

Party Down South, Y'all

Party-down-south-promo  Do you enjoy the incisive cultural commentary of Jersey Shore and the antics of its human stereotypes slash cast members? Raise your glass to a little bit of chicken fried? Then country women and men, though art loosed -- Party Down South may be for you. 

That's what she said. 

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May 19, 2010

A Love Letter to "Law And Order"

Law-and-order-logo  Dear Law and Order: The Original

When I was 21, I moved to NYC to be an actress. What I really wanted to do was appear on Law And Order.

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May 10, 2010

RIP Lena Horne

Lena-horne Singer and actress Lena Horne passed away last night in a New York hospital. She was 92.

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April 22, 2010

Please Bow Your Head For A Minute of Mayhem

Malcolm-mclaren Any good fan of the Sex Pistols felt a little bit saddened when they heard the news earlier this month of Malcolm McLaren's passing. McLaren's family has come up with an idea of what we can all do with our grief.

Malcolm McLaren's son has asked that at midday today, we all observe a moment of mayhem.

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March 16, 2010

Corey Haim's Family Sells His Stuff on E-Bay

Haim_shirtless_corey As if the fact that Corey Haim died at 38 while battling drug addiction wasn't sad enough - now his family is raising the money for his funeral by selling the cuter of the two Corey's belongings on eBay.

Dark.

So you know, you have about a day and a half left if you want to buy Corey Haim's used toothbrush.

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January 06, 2010

Casey Johnson. Sigh.

Casey-johnson-2008 What can I possibly say about this messed-up, tragic and trainwrecky story?

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January 04, 2010

Why I Will Not Be Recapping "The Worst Chefs In America" Or Conversely, Screw You, Cablevision

Foodnetwork_logo  People. I was all set. And then the inconceivable happened. Grab your hankies, this is a sad, sad story.

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January 01, 2010

Old Ladies Who Are Really Demons Freak Me Out

Legion movie poster - character poster (2)  Legion is a movie coming out on January 22nd and it's about the end of the world, and demon ice cream vendors and scary vampire grandmas and angels with shotguns so that means it's pretty much a work of art already. You don't even need to see it. They'll probably hang it in the Louvre and then all you'll have to do is fly to France and go see it for free or whatever they charge to get into the Louvre these days. Okay, maybe it'll be cheaper to just see it in the theaters, but you'll be missing out on a bunch of snobby French people and faux intellectualism. Your choice.

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December 28, 2009

22 People Who Died In 2009 & A Couple Who Didn't

Skull For a lot of people who started out alive in January, 2009 sucked because they died. I guess we made out pretty good, didn't we? Being not dead is the way to be. So here's a list of the best people who died in 2009. That sounded awkward. I don't know how else to say it. If you're dead and didn't make the cut, I'm sorry you're dead. I'm serious. It sucks that you died.

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December 21, 2009

Brittany Murphy's Death Still A Mystery

Brittanymurphy  The tragic story of Brittany Murphy's death just gets weirder and weirder. And of course, terribly sad. 

Latest update is after the jump.

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December 11, 2009

Flight of the Conchords: Officially Over, At Least On HBO

Flight_01 Well. SHIT.

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November 02, 2009

And the Highest Earning Dead Celebrity Is...

Dead_celebrities Who is the highest earning dead celebrity?

I would have guessed Michael Jackson, but I would have been wrong.

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October 13, 2009

Eric Braeden Leaves Young & the Restless, Takes Lady Tickler with Him

MoustacheBy Michael Roe

Where were you when you heard that Eric Braeden is leaving CBS’ top-rated The Young & the Restless as of November 2? Here, just a second ago? Devastating, I know. I’m so, so sorry. My mom didn’t prepare me for the news, either. She just blurted... You were being sarcastic? I don’t heart you. Anyway...

Apparently, Sony wanted to drastically cut Braeden’s salary. 68 year old Braeden’s response?

“What? I didn’t hear what you... hold on... let me turn up my miracle ear.”

Once he was able to hear them, and a minute or two of time required for him to process the information and remember where he was had passed, he proceeded to tell them what they could do with their offer. I’m sure it involved the suits’ Wiis. And, I’m sure Sony was all like, “Uh, Nintendo makes the Wii, Eric. We make the PlayStation.”

“Take your Wii, and shove it up your PlayStation! Now, kindly leave, or I will have you thrown out.”

He was in their office. It was awkward. Like, Hover-Round bumping into the boardroom table, getting all lodged and knocking over pitchers of water onto Sony VAIOs awkward.

The point is, Braeden was born in Germany, and you don’t take a German lightly, especially if that German has a moustache and, at 68, has nothing to live for lose.

Anyway, oh, what a moustache it is. Was.

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