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This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things Archive


May 27, 2010

Internet, Stop Tossing Joshua Bell in My Face

Joshua-bell I really need the internet to quit guilt-tripping me with that Joshua Bell video.

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Rage Against the Baby Bump Watch

Halle-berry-baby-bump1 You know what pisses me off? The baby bump watch.

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I Have A Beef With Dancing With the Stars

Dancing-with-the-stars  I have long held silent on this, but after this last season finale I will hold my tongue no longer.

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May 26, 2010

Brendan Fraser Has a Lot of Integrity

Brendan-fraser The actor is prepared to walk away from a hefty payday because of a dispute with the studio over who should direct -- he'd rather not make the film at all if it means compromising his artistic vision.

This all sounds fantastic until you find out just what movie and directors we're talking about here.

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May 25, 2010

MacGruber Climbs on Top of Pile of Failed SNL-Based Movies

Macgruber Shocking to, perhaps, four or five people, MacGruber, the feature-length adaptation of the Saturday Night Live skit, is officially a box-office bomb.

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Raise Your Hand if You Didn't Watch the "LOST" Finale

Lost-square I know that I run the risk of getting kicked off of the site for admitting this, but I have a confession: I didn't watch the LOST finale.

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May 24, 2010

Bret Easton Ellis Doesn't Think Too Highly of Female Directors

Bret-easton-ellis Perhaps I'm just getting bitter and/or more nonchalant in my old age, but when Bret Easton Ellis says stuff like he doesn't think, in general, that women can direct, I don't get angry. I just kind of shrug and tell him to quit talking and go write some messed up book for me to read kthanxbi.

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May 19, 2010

Roman Polanski Is Accused of More Child Sexual Abuse; Woody Allen Continues to Defend Him

Woody-allen Amid new allegations that rapist Roman Polanski sexually abused another teenage girl, Woody Allen leaps to his defence with the words "[he is] an artist and is a nice person."

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May 17, 2010

I See Promises, Promises and Decide the Newsweek Writer is an Idiot

Sean_Hayes Last week newspapers, television, and pop culture at large was all up in arms over Ramin Setoodeh's opinion that openly gay Sean Hayes should not be playing a straight man in the new Broadway musical Promises, Promises. I saw the show this weekend. He's wrong.

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Christian Anti-Kissing Video Goes Viral, Causes Chills and Cramps

Pamelas-prayer

Want to see something creepy? Like maybe this clip from a Christian abstinence "education" video about waiting until you're married...to kiss?

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May 14, 2010

Holy Crap, I'm Going to Have to Learn to Silk Screen

Picture 10An Andy Warhol self-portrait sold for $32.5 million at an auction in New York this weekend - more than twice the expected auction price. The guys at Sotheby's said cha-ching!

A self portrait.

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May 12, 2010

A Love Letter to Andy Rooney

Andy-rooney  Dear Mr. Rooney,

Can I call you Andy? Will you rant on 60 Minutes for five minutes about how the "kids these days" don't have any respect for their elders? I would love it if you'd rant about me, can we make this happen?

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May 09, 2010

Miley Cyrus' "Can't Be Tamed": A Boon For Creepy Old Men Everywhere

Miley-cyrus-cant-be-tamed2 Happy Mother's Day to all my fellow Moms out there! Hope you have an amazing day! 

That said, I have some bad news for y'all...

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May 07, 2010

For $16,000 You Can Look Like Jessica Rabbit - Sort Of

Annette-jessica_rabbit_makeover Annette Edwards has always loved Jessica Rabbit. Okay, maybe not always, but certainly since 1988.

What do you do when you adore and admire a cartoon character? Get a tattoo? Buy an original drawing? Oh, hell no. That is weak. You get plastic surgery to look like her. Duh.

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Katee Sackhoff: Destroyer of Dreams

Katee-sackhoff-starbuck Fellow True Blood / Sookie Stackhouse fans, picture this, for a moment: The part of Debbie Pelt, the psychopathic batshit crazy wereanimal ex of Alcide, being played by the always awesometastic Katee Sackhoff. Starbuck the Shape-Shifter, if you will. Isn't that just perfection? Doesn't the mere thought of that casting decision make you feel all warm in the naughty bits? 

WELL TOO BAD. SHE TURNED THE PART DOWN.

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