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TV Archive


June 25, 2010

Lost Epilogue: The New Man in Charge

Lost-complete-collection-dvd  Okay, first let me just put this out there and get the rotten-vegetable pelting out of the way: I enjoyed the final episode of Lost and have only very minor quibbles with how they chose to end the series. I realize I am in the minority here. But I was in with the majority of people who hated how the The Sopranos ended at the time, but now realize that the cut-to-black finale was completely fucking brilliant and so this time maybe I'm just trying to make it easier on myself and skip the whole change-of-heart process because it's kind of tiring.

ANYWAY.

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June 24, 2010

Top Chef DC Recap: Episode 2, Out of the Lunch Box

Top-chef-cleaver It is week two of Top Chef DC and our chefs are back in the kitchen - and this week they are pissy.

Who wants to see if I am physically capable of doing a three minute "Top Chef" recap?

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SyFy Challenges Viewers to Create Their Own Movie

Syfy-logo You guys. This is it. This is our big chance. Last night, DinoShark appeared before me, awash in heavenly light, and said, "Raaaahhh!" And because I operate on a higher plane of existence, one where DinoShark and I dish, I knew that that meant, "Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their made-for-TV cinema!"

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June 23, 2010

Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: Revenge of the Squareboob Edition

Danielle-real-housewives-new-jersey Welcome to the first week of Real Housewives of New Jersey Minus One! Dina - aka Captain Zentastic - has left the show to focus on her family, her charity, and her horrifying cadre of hairless cats. Whatever shall we do? Wherever shall we go? There's only one way to find out, people: much like pulling off a band-aid or taking our first dip of the year into the chilly Atlantic, you've just gotta close your eyes... and go all-in.

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June 22, 2010

Subtext Pr0n: The Poster for Mad Men Season 4

Mad-men-season-4-poster The premiere of the fourth season of Mad Men is still over a month away. But the folks behind the promotions for the show are experts at the long tease. The poster for the new season was just released yesterday and doctoral candidates in Media Studies programs all over the country have already added a new chapter to their dissertations, loosely titled "Mommy Said You Broke the Hi-Fi: A Contextual Analysis of the Work/Life Balance of Mid-Century Upper Middle Class Americans and the Socioeconomic Impact of Smoking While Pregnant."

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Celebrity Kids Gone Bad: Jeremy London [Who is Jeremy London?]

Jeremy-london-small  No doubt you've read the gossip about the recent goings-on with Jeremy London.  Homegirl has gotten himself into a hot mess of an intricate situation that seems to have been devised by the writers of Six Feet Under, a four year old and a Choose Your Own Adventure book with half the pages missing. 

So, Jeremy London.  Aside from him being in the center of a riveting bad-accident-scene-type story, who the eff is Jeremy London?

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June 21, 2010

Three Minute Recap: Friday Night Lights "In The Bag"

FNL-vince-quarterback I barely know where to start, there was so much going on in Dillon this week, so let's just get straight to the best bits, shall we? Riggins, Riggins, Riggins, and, oh my succulent stars, Tim Riggins!

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True Blood Recap: Beautifully Broken

True-blood-tommy Nina Simone wrote this great song called "Mississippi Goddamn," which is an upbeat little tune about how messed up Ms. Simone's experiences in Mississippi were at the height of the Civil Rights Movement. Considering how Bill's visit to the Show Me Hospitality State* has gone so far, I'm thinking he may be borrowing a few bars from the High Priestess of Soul before too long.

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June 17, 2010

Top Chef DC Recap: Episode 1, The First One

Top-chef-dc TOP CHEF D.C.! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Yes, I am excited. Of course the first episode is always a cluster you-know-what with 17 chefs to introduce us to and trying to get as many shots with the Capitol in the background as humanly possible.

Shut up. I can be cynical about Washington D.C. landmarks if I feel like it. I live here.

*spoiler alert*

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June 16, 2010

Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: This Little Piggy Edition

Real-Housewives-New-Jersey-DinaEach week, as I watch Real Housewives of New Jersey, I can't help but think of Harlan Ellison. Wait! Wait! Don't run away! Stay with me here for a minute!

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June 15, 2010

"Full Measure": Season Finale of Breaking Bad [Recraps]

Breaking-Bad-Finale-Episode-13-Walt-Mike-Small  We're back, Palinode and I, to recap the season finale of Breaking Bad, only this time we're joined by the esteemed gentleman who actually needs no introduction.  At the table with us exchanging enthusiastic comments about AMC's popular series Breaking Bad starring Emmy-award winning actor Bryan Cranston is DJ Charlie Ann, famed deejay and master mixer of the underground children's house/trance scene and pornographic astrologist to the stars.  We're so not worthy!

Join us, as we breathlessly dissect the entire episode down to every single one of its cells.  That is to say, get comfy.  

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June 14, 2010

True Blood Recap: Bad Blood

True-blood-sookie-jessica-1Ah, at last. The long-awaited premiere of the third season of True Blood...when all of our shapeshifter/vampire sexual fantasies come true.

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Top Five 80s TV Dads

Cosby-sweater  Fathers Day is coming up this weekend, a time of year I find myself thinking a lot about those Coogi-sweatered, sensitive dads from prime time. Thus, consider this a special, Monday edition of Flashback Friday. Here are my top five dads of 80s TV:

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June 11, 2010

FlashForward Fans Stage Global Lying-Down Protest

Flashforward  In a creative attempt to save the cancelled FlashForward, fans around the world are taking part in what's probably the easiest protest gig ever. No picket lines, no heavy signs, no pesky spellchecking of "MORANS." Everybody just...lies down for awhile.

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June 10, 2010

"Top Chef DC" Preview: Chef Fun Facts!

Top Chef DC  I hope nobody was disappointed that I haven't been recapping "Top Chef Masters" but I have trouble tearing people apart who are already successful and doing all of these challenges for charity. That being said, next week "Top Chef DC" begins and I have zero issues making fun of folks who are on reality tv for profit, and I cannot wait.

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