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Vampires Archive


June 21, 2010

True Blood Recap: Beautifully Broken

True-blood-tommy Nina Simone wrote this great song called "Mississippi Goddamn," which is an upbeat little tune about how messed up Ms. Simone's experiences in Mississippi were at the height of the Civil Rights Movement. Considering how Bill's visit to the Show Me Hospitality State* has gone so far, I'm thinking he may be borrowing a few bars from the High Priestess of Soul before too long.

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June 16, 2010

The Slo-Mo Walk: A Good Thing?

Robert-pattinson I've been watching a lot of Twilight lately. I've forbidden my husband from deleting it off the DVR and I've put a secret lock code on it because I don't trust him. The thing is, I don't really like Twilight that much. I think it's an extremely so-so movie with poor acting, laughable dialogue, and a distracting blue wash over the film that does a terrible job convincing me that sunny Oregon is actually rainy Forks. Why do I watch it then? I'm obsessed with the slo-mo walk.

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June 14, 2010

True Blood Recap: Bad Blood

True-blood-sookie-jessica-1Ah, at last. The long-awaited premiere of the third season of True Blood...when all of our shapeshifter/vampire sexual fantasies come true.

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June 02, 2010

New Extended Trailer for True Blood Season 3

True-blood-season-3 The new season of True Blood will begin in 12 days and about 10 hours. Not that I'm counting or anything...

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May 07, 2010

Katee Sackhoff: Destroyer of Dreams

Katee-sackhoff-starbuck Fellow True Blood / Sookie Stackhouse fans, picture this, for a moment: The part of Debbie Pelt, the psychopathic batshit crazy wereanimal ex of Alcide, being played by the always awesometastic Katee Sackhoff. Starbuck the Shape-Shifter, if you will. Isn't that just perfection? Doesn't the mere thought of that casting decision make you feel all warm in the naughty bits? 

WELL TOO BAD. SHE TURNED THE PART DOWN.

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April 19, 2010

True Blood "In Production" Sneak Peeks and Minisodes

 True-blood logo There are exactly 55 days until season 3 of True Blood begins. I'm not, like, counting or anything. It was just some little tidbit that I heard. Somewhere. Ahem.

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Bob Dylan Is Still A Communist Threat But The Beatles Are No Longer A Hassle For Jesus

Bob-dylan black and white bernard ratzinger Bob Dylan is such a badass that China still fears him. However, in other 60s counterculture news, the Vatican finally made peace with the Beatles. "With all these pedophiles running around in vestments, who's got time to worry about the Beatles?" asked the Pope. Not really. But burn, man - I just burned the Pope hard.

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April 16, 2010

Kiefer Sutherland Gets Thrown Out of Strip Club: For Stripping

Kiefer-sutherland No, no, no, Kiefer. When you go into a strip club the people who work there take of their clothes. You and the other patrons are supposed to keep your clothes on. Jesus, Sutherland, how do you expect a stripper to pay her way through college if you do her job for free?

I don't know what was going through his mind - maybe he thought he was in the champagne room, but a topless Kiefer Sutherland got thrown out of a "lap dance club called Stringfellows" in London on Thursday night.

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April 12, 2010

The Insane Clown Posse Ponders Some Science and S#*t

Insane-clown-posse In September 2009, the Insane Clown Posse released their eleventh studio album, entitled Bang! Pow! Boom! Recently, they released a music video for the single "Miracles." And, folks, it's EPIC.

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March 31, 2010

New "Twilight: Eclipse" Stills

Eclipse1  Something for the spank bank! At least for those of you turned on by bad wigs and pasty skin. New stills from Twilight: Eclipse!

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New True Blood Season 3 Promo Posters

True Blood True Blood season three doesn't start until June 13, but new teaser posters are dripping out week by week and HBO better put these on some damn t-shirts like, yesterday. Despite being bloodier than pretty much anything else on TV, this show has an absolutely fantastic sense of humor:

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March 10, 2010

New "Eclipse" Trailer, Like OMG and Stuff

Eclipse Okay. It's only 10 seconds long. But it's got like, 10 hours worth of brooding. Emoting. Yearning. Oh, and Shirtless Jacob.

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March 01, 2010

I Can Has Psychic Powers That Foretell Death

OscarSo Grey's Anatomy wasn't on, forcing me to explore the vast reaches of popular culture for writing fodder and, of course, I found a cat who predicts death.

I know the internet thrives on funny cats. Ha ha ha. Cats. But this cat, Oscar, is no laughing matter. If he snuggles you, you're fucked. I don't even like looking at his picture.

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February 09, 2010

Selections for Your Snowbound Existence

Cabin_fever Many of your faithful MamaPop writers, myself included, are dealing with life under the current bizarro circumstances that come with one of the worst snowstorms ever.

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February 08, 2010

Dwarf Western Asks Important Questions

Last_rites_ransom_pride  The Last Rites of Ransom Pride is a super-western that asks that eternal question that has been spoken in every frat-house since the beginning of time; "Who killed the dwarf?". Now I know they like to be called Little Persons, but since it's Peter Dinklage playing the lead dwarf I don't think there's been a breach of social etiquette here. I think dwarfs are allowed to be called dwarfs so long as the decision to do so is ratified by the Supreme Dwarf Council from Under-mountain or wherever. I don't know. I can't find the chapter of the Bible where the rules are all written down. But my point is, they are probably cool with it.

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