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Wackadoos Archive


April 16, 2010

Kiefer Sutherland Gets Thrown Out of Strip Club: For Stripping

Kiefer-sutherland No, no, no, Kiefer. When you go into a strip club the people who work there take of their clothes. You and the other patrons are supposed to keep your clothes on. Jesus, Sutherland, how do you expect a stripper to pay her way through college if you do her job for free?

I don't know what was going through his mind - maybe he thought he was in the champagne room, but a topless Kiefer Sutherland got thrown out of a "lap dance club called Stringfellows" in London on Thursday night.

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April 15, 2010

Wait: Lady Gaga is ABSTINENT?

Lady_Gaga_Hot_Sexy_Nude-stickers-boobs Lady Gaga says she is abstinent. Well, I'll be damned.

Either that or we are all being punk'd.

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There Are So Many Things Wrong With This Cover, I Don't Know Where To Start

Life and Style coverPunch #1 to the nuts of feminism: Kim Kardashian has lost 5 lbs in 5 days to exact revenge on her former boyfriend, Reggie Bush, for moving on too quickly.  Because that's healthy.  Not just the pound-a-day diet, the idea that she needed to get skinnier to make her ex jealous. 

And that's just the beginning of wrongness that is splattered all over the place with this week's Life & Style cover.

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April 13, 2010

Best Worst Movie Trailer

Best-worst-movie-poster-large

I can't believe I haven't seen this movie -- "Troll 2" -- which is apparently so horrendously bad a specimen of B-Moviedom that a documentary has been made in honor of its epic, unprecedented awful.

I can't wait to see it, of course.

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April 07, 2010

Sarah Jessica Parker Consults Psychic For Marriage Counseling

Sarah-jessica-parker-wedding-dress-carrie sex in the city Sarah Jessica Parker is seeing a psychic to save her marriage.

She told a British magazine that she pays $105 an hour to a psychic named Serena to help get her marriage back on track.

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March 25, 2010

Birdemic: My New Cause

Birdemic I opened the New York Times site today and glanced at the headlines. Depressing. So I navigated my way to the Arts section to see if I could find something to write about today. And then, just like that, Birdemic: Shock and Terror entered my life.

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March 12, 2010

Kendra Wilkinson: Plaster Caster of BOOBS

Kendra-Wilkinson-boobs  Kendra Wilkinson has some big ol' boobs. In fact, after having a baby her boobs are so big that she is considering having a breast reduction.

But not before she makes a cast of the old rack.

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March 11, 2010

Serial Killer Won "Dating Game"

Picture 11 Not that you need another reason not to go on "The Dating Game", but if you were considering using your hot tub time machine for this purpose I should tell you something - Bachelor #1 is going to start killing people in about nine months.

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Brittany Murphy's Widower Continues to Display Classiness

Simon_monjack_brittany_murphy I'm not going to tell anyone how to react to grief. I have never had anyone really close to me die, and I would be willing to bet that once I got past the initial shock, I might drift to more douchey, lashing out behavior. The anger stage of grief might just be a nice way of saying that people trying to cope with tough events become really irritating and do things that are just very questionable. However...Simon Monjack should really think twice before taking a fresh, new date to an Oscar party just three months after Murphy's shocking death.

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March 05, 2010

Naomi Campbell Probably Didn't Beat Up Her Limo Driver So Just Shut Up Already

1naomi

Those of us who know Naomi Campbell understand her to be a calm and collected person. A beacon of peace in an otherwise turbulent and chaotic existence. A symbol of rationality in a world gone mad. And that's exactly why I didn't believe her limo driver when he said that our angelic Naomi had assaulted him while he was driving her around Manhattan. Sure, whatever, buddy. *puts thumb to open mouth and makes drinking signal*

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February 25, 2010

Best Closing Credits To Judge Judy? We Have A Winner!

Screen-capture I have no earthly idea what happened between these people (and frankly, don't care), but my god, this? IS COMEDY GOLD.

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February 24, 2010

Spencer Pratt Tries to Outdo Heidi Montag's Fake Addiction with His Own Fake Addiction

Spencer_pratt_crystal_thumb HA HA HA HO HO HO. This Spencer Pratt character is such a card.

Remember how his once-cute wife, Heidi Montag, suddenly came down with an addiction to plastic surgery that expressed itself all in one day? I think Pratt figured that they were on to something with this addiction thing, and, because they need attention to get paid, he decided that he needed to one-up her brand of fake crazy (see: bland, also boring) with an even stupider brand of fake crazy.

Spencer Pratt has decided that he is ADDICTED TO CRYSTALS.

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Fashion is Danger: Isabel Mastache's Penis Pants

Isabel-Mastache-peen-pant You know how they always give the Project Runway designers to create an "avant garde" look, and it always just results in a lot of...dramatic ruffles and crap? They need to book Isabel Mastache as a guest judge STAT to show those bitches how avant garde is REALLY done.

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February 17, 2010

Hey Look! It is Lady Gaga's Butt.

BRIT-Awards-Lady-Gaga-awards Last night at the BRIT Awards, Lady Gaga decided to moon all of us for a really long time.

(pictures of her ass after the break)

I know you people all love Lady Gaga so I won't be cruel, but, um, put on some clothes, Lady.

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February 10, 2010

BREAKING NEWS: Kate Gosselin Cut Off Her Hair Extensions

Kate-gosselin-wig WHAT ARE YOU DOING? RIGHT NOW? WHATEVER IT IS, STOP IT. HOLD THE PHONE. HOLD YOUR BUTT. THIS IS CRAZY IMPORTANT.

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